2nd fastest way to become a better manager? Study great managers Fastest way? Be managed by one Here’s a story of a manager who changed my life and 3 things I learnt from him…
It’s the 1st year of my teaching fellowship. I have a new manager, Tomos Davies He is supposed to be a tough task master. My then manager says: “Tom will fix you” Context: I never liked following commands & rules given without logic. So I got labelled, ‘Talented but hard to manage’
I brace myself for our 1st team meeting.
Tom: → Opens with a humble & funny introduction (Disarming) → Shares his 3 expectations of us in a clear, respectful & logical manner (Refreshing) → Gives each of us a thoughtful gift (Endearing) I leave the meeting surprised & curious.
Next day he visits my class. I am nervous. Visits by previous manager were criticism barrages. But Tom surprises me: → Shares a list of things I am doing well → Asks questions to understand my choices → Makes a couple of smart suggestions but doesn’t force them on me
My feelings after most manager meetings: Defeated, misunderstood, angry Feelings after Tom’s meeting: → Successful: ‘I am doing many things right’ → Understood: ‘He saw why I did that’ → Thoughtful: ‘Cool question. I should try that suggestion’
Things just got better from there
He subtly balanced encouraging & pushing. My confidence grew & I tried many ideas I had bottled away. Students started having more fun & their learning soared. The class was now seen as an exemplar. Tom unlocked my potential → this helped me do the same for my students.
The thing is, Tom was managing 12 of us. 12 people with different motivations, strengths & challenges. Some were doing better than me & some were doing worse. Yet all of us blossomed under Tom. He gave each person what they needed so they could become the best they could be.
Immediately after the Fellowship I started my own organization. I went from never having managed people to managing 100s over the decade. For most of the early days I just applied the lessons I had learnt from Tom. 3 in particular helped a lot:
1️⃣ FEW EXPECTATIONS, CONSISTENTLY ENFORCED
→ Every team needs some norms & values → Pick a few most critical ones → Enforce them: Articulate clearly, remind regularly, praise publicly, correct privately Tom used this to fix in 2 weeks issues that had plagued us for 2 months
2️⃣ EXPERTISE AS A LEVER NOT A HAMMER
Previous managers hammered me with their expertise: ‘I am smart, you are wrong, do what I say’ Tom used his as a lever: → His questions got me to think → His probing fortified my decision making → His suggestions were good but never forced
3️⃣ UNLEASH DON’T FIX
Tom managed many people. But he didn’t try to mould all us in a set image. He spent time knowing us. Then helped us become the best versions of who we were. This is a mark of exceptional leaders.
Looking back, Tom exemplified this saying: “Don’t try to put in what was left out Try to pull out what was left in That’s hard enough” I was lucky to have him as a manager. He helped me perform to my potential & accelerated my manager journey.
Tom is in a rare category of Leaders who build teams that: Deliver results AND Have great cultures I have spent a decade+ studying them. I share my lessons through these posts.